Love Your Body:

Show Notes:

Summary:

In this episode of “Aging with Grace and Style,” Valerie dives into the topic of body image and self-love, addressing the struggles and challenges many women over 50 face. Through personal experiences and insightful advice, Valerie encourages listeners to challenge unrealistic beauty standards, curate their media intake, appreciate their bodies, and embrace a loving relationship with themselves. She offers practical tips, including closet cleansing, speaking kindly to oneself, finding joy in movement, and seeking a supportive community to enrich the journey to body love.

Timestamps:

:00:00 Introduction to the struggle with body image and the importance of self-love

01:47 Challenging unrealistic beauty standards and curating media intake

04:24 Personal story of weight loss and the journey of body love

07:56 Choosing confidence-boosting clothes and doing a closet cleanse

09:06 Speaking kindly to oneself and using affirmations

10:25 Practicing joyful movement and finding joy in motion

12:25 Building a supportive community and finding your tribe

13:36 Embracing the ongoing journey of self-love and body acceptance

14:15 Conclusion and call to action to try one of the tips

Key Takeaways:

Key takeaways:

  • Challenge unrealistic beauty standards by curating your media intake and seeking diverse beauty representations.
  • Choose clothes that make you feel confident and empowered, and consider doing a mini closet cleanse to eliminate items that don’t make you feel great.
  • Shift your internal dialogue about your body by practicing self-kindness, using affirmations, and trying the post-it note method to promote body appreciation.
  • Engage in joyful movement that celebrates what your body can do and brings you joy, instead of seeing it as a punishment or obligation.
  • Find a supportive community that uplifts and accepts you, and journey towards body love together, one step at a time.

 Connect with Valerie:

  • Leave a voice message at pod.agingwithgraceandstyle.com
  • Facebook, Instagram, and Threads @iamvaleriehatcher 
  •  Email me at hello@agingwithgraceandstyle.com

Join Us Next Time:

If you enjoyed this episode please share, rate, and review. Don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode! 

Stay tuned for more inspiring chats, tips, and stories about the midlife journey.

See you soon! Let’s continue to age with grace, style, and a touch of sass.

Transcript
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Each week, I bring you 5 practical and engaging tips on a

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specific topic. I hope you find them relevant and

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relatable, and we'll come back for more. Ready for today's

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episode? Then let's go.

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Hey girl. Welcome back to aging with grace and style.

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Today. We're talking about body image, a topic that

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hits home for many of us. We're bombarded with

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messages that were never quite enough, not thin enough,

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not young enough, just not enough.

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Well enough already of the not enough. I'm calling

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it. We're enough as we are. So

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grab your favorite drink and let's get into it.

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You know, I've spent countless mornings in

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front of the mirror, picking myself apart, critiquing

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every inch. We all have those voices

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telling us we don't measure up. Maybe it's a

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few wrinkles that we fixate on. Maybe it's stretch

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marks, whatever it is. These become

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our perceived flaws, but

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our bodies tell the stories of our lives. Shouldn't we

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honor them? You know, every

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week I drop 5 tips to help you and

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me navigate through a topic. So let's start with our

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first tip. It's challenge

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the ideal. So let's start

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by challenging the unrealistic beauty standards that

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were sold airbrush perfection and magazines and

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online. They're not our reality.

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Step 1 in our journey to self love is

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curating our media intake.

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Let's call it that I'm not picking on social

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media because I'm on there every day, By the way,

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if you aren't following me, you can do so at, I am

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Valerie Hatcher on all social media channels. But

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anyway, I digressed. If your social feed

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is filled with images that may trigger you to feel bad about

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yourself, Like, you know, maybe people who have

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flawless skin, like not one

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wrinkle, but they say they're 70

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and they look 30 or people who have long thick hair in

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your sustaining people who have maybe the best

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toned bodies and say they never work out. I know you get

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what I mean. We each have our own triggers.

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Then here's what I want you to do.

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Unfollow those accounts that skew these

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perceptions and seek out real

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diverse beauty. It's refreshing and it's far more

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relatable. Today in my pastor's

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message. He said something that has stuck with me. It said

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perception can be a deception, And

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that is certainly true. Let's talk

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about my story. So when I was having hip

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issues and I wasn't mobile, I

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gained weight more than I would have wanted

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And more than what made me feel healthy,

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I would lose a few pounds and then I'd gain it back. So

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fast forward, I had hip replacement surgery surgery

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in, 2022. And I just knew

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that after the surgery and once I was mobile and able to

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work out again, the weight would drop off. Well, it

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didn't. Part of the issue was hormones.

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Part was me eating the wrong things, not getting in

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enough protein, not drinking enough water,

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just a host of things. And I

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kept trying, but it has

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been a long, slow

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journey of losing weight, but it finally clicked

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and I've actually started to drop it.

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Okay. So we're friends, right? So let me be honest with you.

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Before I lost weight, I didn't feel good about my body

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at all. It affected everything, how

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I dressed, how I carried myself and at

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times even affected my attitude. I just,

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I mean, I wasn't happy with me. And then

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once I started to lose weight, I felt healthier. I

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had more energy. I liked how my clothes looked

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on me. My mood was boosted, but

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then new questions arose. I don't think that

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people realize how long I have been working

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on my weight and that while to them,

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it seemed like it happened overnight. To me, it certainly

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didn't. Sometimes the,

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you look so great. Comments actually made me feel insecure.

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Like maybe my former self wasn't

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worthy enough or that I really must

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have looked bad. So here's

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a good one for you. I had one person say,

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if I were to see you on the street,

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I wouldn't even know it was you because you're just

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wasting away. Wasting?

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Really. But the bad part was that these comments

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then made me question

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my weight loss. I recall I was asking my husband, I asked my

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son, I asked my hairstylist and I asked my friend, do I look

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sick or something since I lost weight?

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And this feeling was based on the reactions of

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people. Now what's funny is

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I'm really back to the weight I was 6 years ago, except a lot of

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these people who are making these comments, they

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didn't know me then. But what this has taught me is

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that body love is a

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process. It's not a destination.

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So here's the question for you. What's one

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part of your body that you struggle with.

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Maybe it's your stomach or your thighs.

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Now consider what does that part

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do for you? Our bodies just aren't

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meant to be looked at. They're

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incredible machines. So try focusing on

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what yours allows you to do. Tip number

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2, close as friends and

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not foes. So what we wear

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matters instead of clothes that make you feel blah,

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seek out pieces that boost confidence. This

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was one of my problems when I was unhappy with my weight. I didn't like

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the clothes that I wore. Most things were black. Cause you know,

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they say black is supposed to be slimming. I tried

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to camouflage what I saw and that I didn't like.

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So choose clothes that express how you want to

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feel strong, beautiful, bold.

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It's about feeling good in your own skin.

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Now here's the tip. Yes, it's a tip within the

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tip. How about doing a mini

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closet cleanse, donate the items

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that make you feel less than great.

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Tip number 3, speak kindly to

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yourself. Now, this is where I think that we can

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make a shift with that internal dialogue about our

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bodies. Have you ever noticed how you talk

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about your body to yourself?

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For some of us, it can be harsh. I've said this

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in a recent episode and I say it again here.

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We wouldn't talk to a friend the way we talk to ourselves.

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So why do we let the inner critic just

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run wild? Here's what I want you to

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Start noticing those negative thoughts when they pop

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up, question them or even reframe

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instead of, I hate my thighs. How about

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my legs are strong and they take me where I want to

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go for this. I'm grateful. Find

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one thing that you can appreciate about your body.

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Even if it's small, let that be your starting

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point. How do you feel about

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affirmations? I know they can

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feel a little weird or even silly,

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but I really think they can be helpful. Try

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something like I am beautiful inside

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out. I think affirmations can

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truly rewire your perception over

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time. Now here's something else to try

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the post it note method. I've seen people

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who write simple appreciation comments on a post it

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note and stick it on their mirror. Some

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add to it every day. So they may have a mirror with post it

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notes all around it while others may change out that

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post it note daily. But just imagine you're looking into the

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mirror. And when you look at yourself,

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you also read a positive post it note.

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Now I haven't tried this one since I shared the bathroom mirror with my husband,

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but I'm thinking I might try it on the

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mirror in my office. Why don't you join me?

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Tip number 4, let's shift

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gears to something. That's

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just not about what we see, but how

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we feel. So tip number 4 is all about let's call

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it joy movement. Movement shouldn't

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be a punishment for what you ate or an

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exhausting chase after a certain body type.

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It's about celebrating what your body can

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do. Finding joy in motion,

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whether that dancing in your living room,

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taking a leisurely walk in nature or

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practicing yoga to connect with yourself. It's

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time. We start moving for joy and gratitude and

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not guilt or obligation, listen to your

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body and let it guide you to the types

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of movement that make you feel alive and joyful.

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Finally, tip number 5, find your tribe

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journeying towards body. Love is more

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enriching with the supportive tribe. The battle is

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easier with allies, find women who

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uplift you and who you can be real with

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And they with you, it's transformative to have a

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community that mirrors the love and the acceptance that we're trying to

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cultivate. Now, body love

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won't happen overnight and that's okay. Progress.

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Isn't always linear.

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Body love won't happen overnight and that's okay.

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Progress. Isn't always linear. Some days

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it'll be easier than others. What matters is showing

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up for ourselves, being gentle and

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remembering how amazing our bodies are.

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And there you have it. Friend 5 tips to help you

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build a loving relationship with your body and embrace the journey

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of self love from challenging

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unrealistic beauty standards to finding joy in movement.

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It's all about transforming our mindset

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and actions to celebrate the incredible beings that we are.

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Remember loving yourself and your body.

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It's an ongoing journey. It's it's filled with ups and

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downs. I believe that every step you

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take towards acceptance and kindness is a step

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towards a happier, more fulfilled you.

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So keep challenging the norms, keep moving with

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joy. And most importantly, keep loving

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yourself fiercely and unapologetically.

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Here's what I want you to do this week. Pick just one

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of these tips and give it a try. Notice any

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shifts in how you feel about yourself. Share your

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experiences with me via voice message at pod dot

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aging with grace and style dot com until next

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time. Remember you are beautiful.

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You are strong and you are so worthy of

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love inside and out. Keep going

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girl. Thank

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you so much for joining me for 5 to Thrive Tuesday. If you haven't

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already done so, please subscribe so that you don't miss an episode.

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If you enjoyed this segment, please rate, review, and share it with

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a friend. Let's stay connected on Instagram,

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Facebook, and or threads at I am Valerie Hatcher,

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or email me at hello at aging with grace and style dot

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com. Until next time, let's continue to age with

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grace, style, and a touch of sass.

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